Planning these financial futures can feel overwhelming, especially when daily life already includes appointments, caregiving, and financial pressures. A thoughtful plan can help connect the parents’ retirement goals with their loved one’s future needs. The goal is not to have every answer today, but to take one meaningful step at a time.
Parents Should Start With the Loved One They Want to Support
Parents should think about what a fulfilling life could look like for their loved one. Where might their loved one live? Will that individual need assistance with transportation, employment, health care, or daily activities? Which relationships, interests, and routines are most important to their loved one?
Parents should include their loved ones in these conversations as much as possible. Their preferences and abilities should help shape the plan.
Next, parents should consider the financial picture. Some expenses may be covered by benefits or community programs. Others may require family resources. Parents should account for the support currently provided without charge. If parents manage appointments, prepare meals, or provide transportation, replacing that help could create future expenses. Parents should estimate future support costs as a starting point. They can adjust it as their loved one’s needs, available services, and family circumstances evolve.
Parents Should Make Their Retirement Part of the Plan
Parents may feel that they can’t retire or that every available dollar should go toward their child’s future. However, parents’ retirement and financial stability deserve a place in the plan, too.
The retirement plan should consider everyday expenses, health care, housing, inflation, and the possibility that they may eventually need care. It should also account for any ongoing support they expect to provide to their loved one.
Parents should consider what would happen if one parent passed away or could no longer provide care. Would household income change? Would additional paid support be needed? Planning for these scenarios can help parents identify gaps before a crisis forces decisions.
Planning for retirement is one way to strengthen the foundation the family will rely on.
Parents Should Coordinate Benefits With the Family Plan
Government benefits may be an important part of the loved one’s support, but different programs have different eligibility rules. Supplemental Security Income (SSI) and certain Medicaid programs consider income and resources. A gift, inheritance, or payment resulting from a beneficiary designation can affect those benefits if it is not coordinated carefully.
A parent’s retirement can also create a new benefit opportunity. An eligible adult whose disability began before age 22 may qualify for Disabled Adult Child benefits on a parent’s Social Security record, when that parent begins receiving retirement or disability benefits or passes away. Additional eligibility requirements apply.
Because a new benefit may affect existing assistance, parents should review the interaction among Social Security, SSI, and Medicaid before making decisions. Social Security claiming deserves a family-wide review that considers the retirement income, as well as the loved one’s benefits.
Parents Should Give Each Planning Tool a Purpose
A properly drafted and administered special needs trust may help hold funds for the loved one, while preserving eligibility for certain means-tested benefits. If parents plan to leave their own assets, a third-party special needs trust may be appropriate. Trust terms and distributions matter, so an attorney experienced in special needs planning should guide its creation.
An ABLE account may provide another way for an eligible individual to save and pay for qualified disability expenses, with tax-free qualified withdrawals. Contribution limits, benefit-related rules, and potential Medicaid recovery provisions require careful review. An ABLE account and a trust may serve complementary purposes.
Life insurance may help provide money for future support after a parent’s death. If a trust is part of the plan, parents should coordinate beneficiary designations with their attorney.
Retirement accounts also need attention. Leaving an IRA to a trust can involve complex distribution and tax rules. Financial, legal, and tax professionals should review the account, beneficiary designation, and trust language together.
Parents Should Prepare the People Who Will Carry the Plan Forward
Money is only one part of lifelong support. Parents also need to identify who could coordinate care, manage funds, advocate for services, and remain involved in their loved one’s life.
These responsibilities do not necessarily belong to one person. A sibling might offer emotional support, while a trustee manages finances and another trusted person helps coordinate care. Discussing expectations in advance gives everyone a clearer understanding of their role.
A letter of intent can document routines, medical providers, communication preferences, important relationships, and hopes for the future. Although it does not replace legal documents, it can give future caregivers valuable guidance that account statements cannot provide.
Parents Should Start With One Meaningful Step
As the year draws to a close, parents should choose one action: estimate their loved one’s future support costs, outline their retirement expenses, review beneficiaries, organize benefit information, update a letter of intent, or schedule a planning conversation.
For help getting started, a Chartered Special Needs Consultant® (ChSNC®) can provide parents with guidance.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Ashley Mariani, ChSNC®, is the founder of Thriving Financial. She helps individuals and families navigate special needs planning, retirement planning, and long-term financial protection. For educational resources or assistance developing a coordinated financial plan for a loved one with special needs, visit ThrivingFinancialPartners.com to schedule a complimentary consultation.
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